Tuesday, January 21, 2014

new skills

Amusing today to find I do actually learn pretty quickly. Taking Ikea furniture apart in preparation for my move, I was at least 75% faster on the last bookcase than I was on the first.

My landlords are going out of their way to ease the move for everyone, offering to be here to help me with moving furniture when my former housemate gets the carpets professionally cleaned (she had cats), and even to helping me actually move. All that, even though I have booked a moving crew!

ken told me if he can swing it with his buddy, I may be able to tell my movers I don't need them and thereby save a bit of money.

I bought a lovely table from the guy whose suite I'm moving into. I've even started to make plans for decorating it and making it "mine."

Still, I'm a bit numb. I stubbornly hang on to hope. But I know what I haven't really acknowledged completely to myself is what I really want feel and give vent to, all the terrible emotions that I can't persuade myself with any logic to let loose, to allow myself to open up and relieve the pressure a bit. 

But I don't feel them. Not really.  Or they are so far away, I feel a drop once in a while, a whisper of moisture on my cheek and I wonder, "is it raining?"

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